Thursday, February 09, 2006

This One Isn't Funny

Most of the time I venture into my blog to tell a story that is amusing on some level. I pride myself in having the ability to make nearly every story in life seem like it was a great time, even if it wasn't entirely... Tonight I am too tired for that. I've worked more in the last two weeks than the average person works in a month. I have moved things in such an intense direction because I feel as though I have to squeeze meaningful conversation into a five minute time slot and a relationship into a one-inch binder that I can pull off the shelf at my convenience. The only problem is that I get the feeling that those around me are doing the same thing. As more people condense me into a few funny stories, flashes of memory and the occassional pulling off the shelf, I realize that I need people in my life that have dimension and people who want that out of me. I need people who will sit with me and play cards, talk about faith, discuss the problems with mass marketing, enjoy the beauty of science, laugh so hard they cry, and cry so hard they laugh. I need people who will call me to go to the zoo, drink a beer in my name when I have to work late, understand that sometimes I'm not feeling all that clever, play original Nintendo, and eat takeout. I need people who know me. Not just the silly girl who works more than she does anything else... but the me that used to feel smart and attractive and wanted.

I guess I am saying I need friends... not myspace "friends" or club aquaintences... but the friends that will dislike someone just because you do and love someone for the same reason...

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