Sunday, April 26, 2009

Date 29: Simply Fon-don't

All I can say is wow... with the exception of the few things I have planned in the next couple weeks, after this one, I need a break.

Simply Fon-Don't was perfect on the phone. His emails were witty. He was my type.

Nerdy. Smart. Dark hair. Pale skin. Tall. Did I mention nerdy?

We met at Simply Fondue in Sundance Square. When he came down the stairs my heart skipped a beat. I was smitten. The wait was just a few minutes and we were whisked off to the table.

The menu was overwhelming and I could feel my food issues boiling to the surface. I shook it off though, because this guy was dating gold.

Conversation was comfortable. The restaurant was lovely. My phone was vibrating. *Ignore*

The obligatory, what does he look like/are you okay/should I call the cops texts were streaming in. No big deal. He looked like someone I could totally get horizontal with which made me more than okay and there is no reason to call the cops... the fire department? Perhaps. This date could get hot.

He tells me he works in a secluded basement type room with no windows, no cell phone service, no outsiders. No big deal.

He tells me he doesn't really like working with other people. Okay, he enjoys going solo sometimes. Fine.

He tells me he doesn't actually enjoy working out. He just does it so he doesn't gain as much weight. Well...

He tells me he doesn't get to work at any particular time because he likes to sleep in and sometimes he gets up midweek after 10am. Free spirit. Loves the night life. Ummm...

He eats his food. And then mine. And then asks the waitress for more of some things. And suddenly I feel like he is eating my soul one fried piece at a time. I get tunnel vision and all I see is chewing. Dipping. Sizzling fried pieces of meat. Stabbing another morsel of uncooked food. Dipping. Sizzling. Chewing.

I actually feel like I might pass out. It's hard to explain. Here was this smart, witty, attractive man and I wanted to melt into the floor and disappear forever. I could have worked with the anti social man lacking in a schedule, but the eating, that I just couldn't do.

The problem with this date was definitely me. Thus the break. I need it. I've done well maintaining emotional distance from this whole mess until now. This evening, however, has resulted in tears.

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