Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Goodbye House...

After a series of stressful events, we finally closed on our house in NRH on Monday morning.  Today, I'll do my best to get through the events, the positives, and the goodbyes...


Most of my things have been out of the house since late last year.  Or at least the things I use frequently... clothes, crafting supplies, electronics, a few well loved books... The rest has been gradually sold off or would be going in the last minute fire sale on Saturday. We had a great garage sale and even posted some of the items individually... like the couch that screams, "single white girl lives here!" and the desk that brings the world graduate degrees... In fact the very car that made it's debut here in October 2005 was sold along with so many other possessions. To be honest, I might have been having an anxiety attack watching everything I'd accumulated over the years in the house slowly disappear. Thankfully, just when I really hit the wall, a great friend (who has graced me with his friendship for nearly 20 years) and his lovely bride came by with booze.


Now the deals are really flying.

Sunday, came and we continued on our quest to trash the rest of the items and get the house cleaned out.  We took a short break from the cleaning to run my brother back to our house so he could get on the road home and then we went by the storage unit to abandon some boxes... At some point during that short time, the homeowner to be came by the house unannounced and 1) spilled coffee on the (at his request) freshly cleaned carpet, 2) left boxes like he owned the place already, and 3) called my Realtor to let him know there was still stuff in the house.  Okay, ass hat.  1) What the frick.  2) I'm trying to clean and you DON'T OWN THE HOUSE YET. 3) I can keep everything I own in there until close and could even throw a raging drunk fest Sunday night if I wanted... In fact, I could use the things you left there...

Perhaps the giant bottle of booze you left in the bathroom?  Freaky...

Or perhaps your other box of "goodies"... I hope people are judging you, because I sure was.

So Monday morning... I've not slept well or much for the last few days.  The amount of work to be done and the stress of said work was wearing thin. 6:20am - Text from my Realtor telling me I needed to bring money to closing.  WHAT!?! Seriously.  In our contract we agreed to a sells price and that I would pay $0 in closing costs.  The ass hat buying the house had a VA loan so he couldn't pay the closing costs either... strange. Pretty sure he knew that (not anywhere near as young as the goodies box might have lead you to believe).  So I've been crewed, morning of... for $2555.22.  That is not chump change.  Good thing I sold my PT Loser Saturday.

Tears.  Hyperventilating.  Asthma attack.  Snot on face like toddler. I looked so hot.

The woman at the title company, after several hours of work found a way to get that figure down to $1355.22.  I guess I can handle that, so off we went, 2 hours late, to closing.  That's when I saw ass hat.  Yep, he's old and stuff.  After everything, all I could do was smile and think to myself, "you're the guy that needs 20% more lube?"

Fifteen minutes later and we were done.  No more house.


  1. I no longer own the rodent problem... 
  2. I don't have to move the neighbor's yard anymore... the one who let her weeds grow OVER the 6' privacy fence
  3.  I don't have to see the glow of Auto Zone or the Chicken Place out my window at night
  4. I don't live one street from Watauga (check that place out on the sex offender map)
  5. I don't live next to a house with a non-working vehicle in the driveway... one that has been stationary for at least 5 years
  6. New Guy and I only have one mortgage! (and one electric bill, and one water bill, and one property to pay taxes on, and one set of homeowner's insurance, and one yard to maintain, and one house to clean, and...)
  7. The neighborhood was turning, there have been recent "upgrades" giving that neighborhood a turquoise house, a TCU purple house, and a banana yellow house
There are so many more positives.  But the point has been made. And I feel like a winner despite the $1355.22. 


This is the last place my mom was well enough to have a good laugh at Maury Povich. I know it's crazy, but I have this fear that if it's all been a crazy dream, she will come looking for me and won't know where to find me... Like I said, I know it's crazy.  This is the first place I owned.  This is where I lived when I met New Guy. This is where I thought my mom would move when she retired.  This house was greatness for the most part and I loved it. I'll miss my final safety net from New Guy... but he said he was happy it was gone and that we were stuck with each other. 

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